808s & Heartbreak by Kanye West

So, I know this album came out in December of last year, but it is an album that has offered up such a diverse set of opinions, so I thought I would offer up the reasons why I love this album, even though everything about it seems like I would hate it. I do not enjoy it when rappers try and sing. I loathe the auto tune that T-Pain has made far too popular and I do not like entire albums where every song is essentially saying the same thing, yet, I find myself totally entranced by this album.

1. Say You Will- Production wise, this is song ls flawless to me. The track is so haunting and weird. I feel like this is song is the soundtrack to a tripped out romantic nightmare. The random "flashing light" sounds add to this weirdly crafted creepy lullaby. Lyrically the track is a bit all over the place, but it works for me. It works as a broken hearted guy working his way through some serious stuff. Plus it has one of the dopest personifications with "Take off your cool." I love the idea that cool is something that can just be removed like a hate or a coat. The song really sets up where the album is going. 5/5

2. Welcome to heartbreak- It is a thin line for famous people to complain about their perfect lives. No one wants to hear a rapper complaining about how lonely he is. However, it works for me here because Kanye offers up an interesting side of this coin when he says "My friend showed me pictures of his kids and all I could do was show pictures of my cribs." I rarely think of rappers as wanted to be domestic. I mean many rappers have many children, but this line is different to me. The beat is again, kind of a walking romantic nightmare, but a little more bouncy. Kanye's voice is a lot more distorted on this track as he loses grip with humanity and what it means to be human. It is good shit, really. 5/5

3. Heartless- By now you have heard this track and seen the awesomely odd animated video a few dozen times, so you are familiar with the train like sound of the beat. The beat is in constant motion, like Kanye's brain as he tries to figure everything out as to why is girl broke up with him. His claim that "he lost his soul to a woman so heartless" is an interesting one because we just do not assume rappers have these kinds of emotions. Rappers are always so hard and so brash and confident, this peak into the inner demons of someone as cocky as Mr. West intrigues me to no end. Lyrically I am not an enamoured with this track as I am with others and I think I would have liked this better without the auto tune voice distortion. 3.5/5

4. Amazing- I am not sure why I think this beat is so funky, but it is. I like the feel of someone beating sticks together to give the beat the bounce. It is a bit more raw than I am used to from Kanye. His stuff usually sounds so clean and crips and this is almost lazy. I dig it. The song does not actually make a whole lot of sense in fitting with the theme of the album nor to the lyrics make sense. I guess this is Kanye's "I'm still cocky song" as he rattles off couplets like "I'm a problem That'll never ever be solved." There is a long break before Young Jeezy begins his guest verse and it makes you really excited for Jeezy and Jeezy's voice sounds perfect over this lazy beat, but I still do not like him. 3.5/5

5. Love Lockdown- Here is Kanye's big number. With African sounding drums and his most awesome voice distortion, this is Kanye at his broken hearted best. The singing is almost void of emotion. That is how cold and distant Kanye sounds as he lays his heart out with this awesome lyric "I'm in love with you, but the vibe is wrong and that haunted me, all the way home." Kanye is really in a groove with this song. there is something almost freeing in how crazy the beat goes, yet Kanye is still trapped by his broken heart. He is cold, but the beat is on fire. I like it. 5/5

6. Paranoid- Future Kanye beat alert! Here is a futuristic and Euro sounding beat and Kanye really makes it his own with robotic sounds and usually I hate lines being repeated constantly but his "You worry about the wrong things" repeated over and over at the top of the song works for me. This is his most rapped track and when the best gets going, Kanye is right on the beat and he attacks it with more energy than the rest of the album. Here is his "I am blaming my girl" song. I do not know step of the break up this tracks is, but I feel like Kanye is finally fed up on the track. he is tired of being sad. Now, the rest of album will disprove that theory, but this song is almost danceable, which is cool on a break up album. 4/5

7. Robocop- I like that on an album void of sounding like a human, Kanye can have a song where he thinks his girl is not human. If the album is Kanye questioning his own humanity, this song might be what caused this question. I love the violins that are all over this track. Hip-Hop has kind of an odd relationship with violin sounds, but here there is a perfect marriage or violins, distorted bass sounds, robotic sounds and wicked flashing light sounds. His girl is crazy, as he likens her to "the girl from misery." He also says he likes that she is crazy, at least for a while. This is the most interesting sounding song, I think. 5/5

8. Street Lights- This is the most depressing song on the album. It is the most break up worthy song on an album of break up songs. There is no real chorus and it feels like just a stream of consciousness track as a guy is just wandering down an empty street as his girl broke up with him. He get crazy distorted as the beat almost goes totally away and he sounds incredibly defeated as he sighs out "Life's just not fair." Again, this is Kanye West doing this. The guy is the ultimate cocky jerk and here is showing just how insecure he can be. I think this intimate look into the soul of Mr. West is what makes him such an engaging figure. 5/5

9. Bad News- This is my least favorite song on the album. The beat is totally derivative of a few of the other tracks and his singing is at its weakest here. I understand that the song is about Kanye finding out his girl cheated on him, but I was hoping he could muster up a bit more power to mask the weaker lyrics. The distortion is pretty effective, but I actually want to hear his humanity on this track. Maybe the weak singing would not bother me if he was not distorted on a track like this. 2.5/5

10. See you in my Nightmares- I wish Lil Wayne was not on this because he almost ruins a seriously dope track. The reoccurring theme of a beat that sounds like a romantic nightmare is back. There is something almost resolute in this track. As if, Kanye is leaving his girl and he knows that he will see her when he sleeps, but when he is awake, he is soldiering on and he has a bit of his confidence back. he is nearly brash as he proclaims "Okay, I got you off my mind." This actually works because this is the final track dealing with his break up. This is the end of the concept of the album. Lil Wayne is not as annoying as usual and his voice actually works for the hook, but when he starts rapping, I just do not get the guy. I like the way his voice bends, though, by using the auto tune. 4/5

11. Coldest Winter- When I saw Kanye he nearly broke down in singing "Hey Mame" right after his mother passed on. This is his song to his mother and it is utterly heart breaking to me. It really shows how much he depended on his mother for things. It may sound stupid to have to say that, but I like the idea of this song. I like the idea that he is still being sheltered by his mother by his memories. I like that he questions whether he can love someone else after going through the agony of losing his mother. I like that there is a rapper who has gone essentially a whole album discussing his inner monologue of insecurities. 5/5

12- Pinocchio Story- This is a live "freestyle" that does not actually make much sense, really. He is rapping over a very sparse piano for the most part. Well, is singing, really. The song is about what it means to be real. I like the concept and have enjoyed watching and listening to other things that tackle this theme. I am just not sure I need this particular song. First off it is far too long and it is pretty meandering. He repeats himself often and the crowd cheers get a bit annoying. I want to like it, because he sounds like he is being so earnest on every word, but it rings a false to me. 2/5

Kanye West is not afraid to take risks and he is at a level where he can do it and stay profitable, which is kind of cool. He is a man who has built his entire persona on being crazy outspoken and saying the most ridiculously cocky things, but here he releases an album that is almost void of it all. Yes, it is a self indulgent, but is that really such a bad thing? Typically interesting or crazy art is spawned from some sort of self-indulgence and I happen to like things that are self indulgent!

Watchmen

I could spend time going on and on about how important the graphic novel was/is. I could hit you over the head about it, but seriously, just read it. Most fans of this novel have been opposed to the idea of a film adaptation forever. I am not one of those people. Since I first read it when I was 13, I have been dying to see it on the screen. I just wanted to see how someone could do it. Being a movie person above everything else, I wanted to know how it would look. I wanted to see what all of my favorite not-so-super superheroes would look like actually walking and talking and fighting. The time is finally here. So with 15 years of me waiting for it, how does it stack up? Also, doing a full summary is nearly impossible, so I will probably miss a lot. Sorry.

Watchmen exists in a different reality where masked crime fighters do not have super powers, they just have an ability to go outside of the law. It is set in the 1980s, in a world where Richard Nixon gets re-elected 5 times because he won the Vietnam war. he won it with the help of these masked heroes, especially Dr. Manhattan(Billy Crudup), the one with actual powers. Do to some crazy circumstances, Manhattan is now a glowing blue and he lives outside of our ideas of time and space. He can manipulate matter and sees the future. The film is set off by the murder of The Comedian(Jeffrey Dean Morgan) and Rorschack's(Jackie Earle Haley)belief that someone is killing off costumed superheroes. See, costumed heroes have been outlawed because the city cops felt threatened. So, everyone has retired except Rorschach. Rorschach wants to warn all of the former heroes so he visits Night Owl(Patrick Wilson), Dr. Manhattan and Miss Jupiter/Silk Spectre 2 (Malin Ackerman). No one seems to share his concern, but Night Owl goes to visit Ozymandias(Matthew Goode) to warn him anyway. Ozy is the world's smartest man and he has made a fortune selling out his super hero past. Soon, these Watchmen are back on the hunt as costumed heroes and searching for what might actually be going on.

At 2 hours and 45 minutes, Watchmen offers a whole lot of dialog to chew on and a whole lot of questions to think on. It also offers up some of the most brutal violence I have ever seen in a movie, especially one this massive. There is something totally shocking about seeing a superhero inflict that much carnage, which is the point. Watchmen, as a graphic novel, attempted to subvert our ideas of what being a superhero was. As a film, Watchmen is subverting our ideas of what a superhero movie should be. It is pointing out how absurd it is that we have these PG-13 superhero movies because superheroes have the kinds of powers that would cause serious violence but we never see it. Watchmen gives us the blood, the breaking bones and the carnage people like Superman would actually inflict. It is also pointing out how stupid the costumes can be. The Comedian wears the tiniest mask, yet remains unknown? Miss Jupiter wears something sexy, only because she is supposed to be sexy. I am not sure Zack Snyder totally hits his subversion claim, but he makes a serious attempt and mostly succeeds.

Watchmen wants us to question what makes someone a hero. That has always been the underlying claim of the novel. The Comedian is a horrible person, but he is not considered a super villain because he fights for America and he is after criminals that may or may not actually be worse than he is. The film does a good job of maintaining that. Rorschach is an absolutely brutal human being but he has a set of moral standards and he is resolute in them. Then you have Night Owl and Miss Jupiter. Night Owl hides his humanity in his technology and he is a nerdy bumbling man, but in costume he is confident and alive. He seems very much a normal guy, but he is hiding that desire to put his costume back on. Miss Jupiter was only a costumed hero to please her mother, but she misses it. There is something exciting about that world and when Night Owl and Miss Jupiter finally start fighting again, their world's ignite, literally for a second. Watchmen gets extra points for not playing impotence as a joke, like most movies do. The impotence makes the sex later a bit more interesting, as it questions masculinity or points that masculinity is wrapped up in being a superhero. I do wish Snyder took the sex a bit more seriously when it happens, but it is hard to fault the man for putting these two hot naked people in slow motion and giving a lot of thrusting.

This is not an easy movie to watch and/or follow. It requires patience and full attention. The action is loud and brutal, but it is slowed down and not as choppy as most, so you get to see how beautifully choreographed it is. The blood and gore factor are out of this world for anything other than a horror movie. The acting is a mix of bloody brilliant(Haley and Crudup) pretty good(Morgan, Wilson) and just downright awful(Ackerman). As Rorschach, Haley is not only a coiled snake ready to pounce, he is a force to be reckoned with. All growly and bad ass, his Rorschach is a bit more intimidating than I anticipating with his mere presence and seeing his shifting mask actually move, was astounding. I wanted to like Wilson more as Night Owl, but I think Ackerman was more the problem with them and it kind of brought Wilson down, but Ackerman does serves her purpose. See, Miss Jupiter has to engage in a sex scene and be naked. Well so many young and hot actresses refuse such things, she she is what we get. I have seen her act decently in other movies, this movie is beyond her scope as an actress. She is not a distraction, though and she does look phenomenal, which is important. I imagine many people will tune out Dr. Manhattan, which is a shame because he offers a lot of interesting gems about life and love from an outsider's perspective. He is an interesting case study as the anti-Superman. Whereas Superman was always coming from a place of trying to be human in every way, Manhattan has no desire for such things. He can see the future, but knows he cannot change it.

Watchmen offers a pretty cynical view of the world and a bleak look at humanity and the movie does not shy away from it at all. The ending has changed from the novel, but it works better this way in the movie. If they were to keep the graphic novel ending, there would have been another 30 minutes of movie and the audience would have tuned out, I imagine a giant squid would have confused people a bit. I was actually quite surprised at how some of the events from the novel stayed in the movie because I thought the studio might make Snyder tone down the whole thing a bit, but am happy they let Snyder really do this the way he wanted.

The last thing I want to mention is the use of popular music in the movie. I think it is brilliant in almost every moment except the sex. Snyder gives us a super cheesy slow motion thrusting over Leonard Cohen covering Hallelujah. That being said, Bob Dylan over the opening credits, Ride of the Valkyries in Vietnam, and Jimi Hendrix during flight, are all superb. Snyder certainly has a Tarantino like mind for popular music in his movies.

After waiting 15 years for this movie, I am happy to say I was not at all disappointed. I was so giddy when it was over and over the the days following, I just thought about more and more things I loved. I hope this review gets through the love I have for the material and how pleased I am that it worked. This was not an easy thing to do and Zack Snyder has proven himself as a master adapter. I hope his next project, totally original, keeps his winning streak alive.

Final grade: A

This week in television (March 2-7)

This section will probably go through some changes as I figure out exactly what I want to do and say with it.

Top 5 television moments

5. How I Met Your Mother(HIMYM)- Barney Stinson(Neil Patrick Harris) hires an actress and a child actor to play his family for the benefit of his mother. The child actor cannot remember his name or his lines prompting Barney, as NPH, to proclaim "Child actors were so much better in the 80s." HIMYM has played on the Doogie Howser thing before and they get a big laugh out of me for this one.

4. Reaper- I am really happy to have this show back because it seems like it is going to be mythology heavy now, which interests me. Sock, a Kevin Smith-esque character, tries to move back home to find he has a super hot stepsister and he is conflicted because he wants to date her. His buddy Ben says she is hot and Sock responds with "Dude, thats my sister. I got dibs." Thank you Reaper.

3. 24- I have no idea where else a show can go, honestly. The white is sieged, The PRresident kidnapped and slapped! Jack Bauer has to helplessly look on. Just a WOW 2 hours, seriously. The key moment being Madame President being slapped by a big African guy.

2. Friday Night Lights- This is the ultimate tug-at-Kyle's-heart-strings show. Jason Street and Tim Riggins have been through everything together and it is time for Street to move out of Texas and be a man. The two young men share a brief moment of sentimental honesty where Riggins shows just how much he cares. Oh guy-love how I love thee. I wish this show did better!

1. Lost- I think you could make an argument for Jack, but for my money, Sawyer has made the biggest character transformation. As Sawyer, he was mean, a loner and almost a villain. As James, he is a romantic and a leader of men. he is confident now and the best moment from this week's episode is James picking a flower for Julliete and bringing it home so they can continue in this groovy 1970s love thing. It was such unadulturated happiness only to be challenged in the final moments. Oh Lost, I wish I could quit you.

Most disappointing show of the week

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles(TTSCC)- I am glad the whole Riley thing is finally over because I was over that chick, but something tells me there is going to be fall out and not the good fall out. This show started off strong in the first two episodes of the season but the last two have been weak. This week was far too much talk and not enough action for my taste. I need more stuff being blowed up!

Best use of Gratuitous hotness (Kyle's shallow award)

My guess this award will only ever go to something from Chuck, TTSCC or Dollhouse.

Dollhouse- Eliza Dushku hikes up her skirt, with thigh high boots and fixes her breasts, why? Because she is hot and that is what hot bad girls do. She also gives a bit of a lap dance while eating a cherry. Then later she takes her shirt off and the camera just sits at her breasts. All of this serves no real purpose, which is why I love it.

Porky's (Throwback Thursday)

I was actually glad Robbie put this movie on the list of movies because I had never seen it from beginning to end. Oh sure, I have seen bits and pieces in my life, but a 1980s sex comedy set in the 50s(?) just did not seem like something I could after watching American Pie. Porky's is known as the predecessor of movies like American Pie. It is the teen sex comedy all other teen sex comedies aspire to be. That is kind of a tall order for a movie that should be out dated now 27 years later.

Pee Wee(Dan Monahan) is desperate to have sex(again, or for the first time?). he is your typical high school kid, except he is a loser who plays basketball. Typically in movies, losers are not athletes (Point for Porky's). His friends are constantly making him the butt of the jokes and his energy is pretty annoying. His friends are a who's who of high school archetypes, which is nice. I like the familiarity. We get a redneck, a tough guy, a smart guy and a big dumb jock. Their names are not nearly as important as their quality. One thing they all love is naked women. One night they think they are going to pay at a strip club to have sex. The club is Porky's and Porky is a big fat mean cigar chewing man. He pranks the kids because he does not want underage kids in his club. Wait, basketball stars not allowed in a strip club for being underage (Point 2 for Porky's)? The redneck keeps going back to Porky's to even the score and he keeps getting the crap beat out of him. Fed up the friends need to find a way to pay Porky's back for the money they lost, the bruises and the embarrassment.

There are two side plots in Porky's that seem very out of place in a movie that is a teen sex comedy. the tough guy is actually abused by his father and the tough guy is an anti-Semite because his dad is. There are a few frank discussions about these topics and I applaud this movie for going there. This is what makes Porky's more than just a teen sex comedy. American Pie is just a teen sex comedy. it is the best one in that genre, but Porky's is more than that. Sure, there are plenty of sex jokes and sex gags and an abundance of female and male nudity, but when the movie was over, I was left thinking about these issues of abuse and racism. Whereas the American Pie gang were only concerned with sex, these guys are real friends helping each other through rough patches. These are friends that stand up to a drunk nasty dad, but know when to stay out of a fight as well. The biggest thing in a teen sex comedy is chemistry and these guys all have tons of it together. I believed all of these guys could very well be friends and I kind of wanted to hang out with them, even if they pull the craziest stunts.

The acting is serviceable for the most part, although I would have liked Pee Wee to be just a little bit less obnoxious, but it made the character work, I guess. There is a side plot with a gym coach and a teacher that is totally pointless except for providing some supposed laughs in one scene. Don't get me wrong the movie is plenty funny, that scene just does not do anything for me. Some of the jokes are a bit dated, but the movie is still plenty funny. I really enjoyed the easy going attitude of some of the friends. They provided some nice laid back laughs. It was as if this crazy nonsense was totally normal in the lives of these teens. There is something interesting about not feeling crazy amidst the craziness.

If you look at Porky's as just a teen sex comedy, I think it lacks things. Yes, it opens with a morning wood joke and continues to a penis measuring joke, but there are huge sections of movie that have nothing to do with sex and that climax has nothing about sex. It becomes a revenge flick. I love that Porky should be punished for not letting the under age kids have sex with his strippers, but I guess that is the fantasy of a movie. We are supposed to root for the sex crazed teenagers and not the business man trying to keep his business from catering to underage guys. What a nice fantasy world to inhabit!

Final Grade: B

The sad reality that 3D is not going anywhere

I wish I had a more clever title for this little essay/rant. I feel like I kind of give my entire argument away in the title, but oh well. It is my blog I can do what I want.

In less than a year, I have watched 3 movies in the 3D format and there are another few left to come out this year. Theaters are slowly being upgraded to include a digital/3D auditorium, with Reel-D (the biggest 3D company) promising to put over 2500 3D ready screens and projectors in Cinemark theaters across the country. This is a trend that is not going away and I guess I have to reserve myself to this fact. I want to be engaged by the 3D. I do. I want to understand this idea of movies seeming to be more interactive, but I just cannot get behind it. I know, I have seen 3 of them so it seems like I am behind it, but trust me, I am not.

Last summer was my first experience in 3D in a real movie theater. I went and watched Journey to the Center of the Earth. I reviewed it and said that it would have been worthless without the 3D. I still stand behind that, but I also do not think the movie is worth anything, even in 3D. There have been better dinosaur movies made and better Brendan Frasier movies made. The fundamental problem with 3D movies is that they have to feature enough 3D effects to satisfy those who paid the extra $2.50 for the glasses. This means yo-yos, kites, and other things that jump. Can it work? Sure it can. "Journey" featured a nice attack fish jumping at me and My Bloody Valentine had a really nice detached jaw and blood flying at me. Very cool. Yet, The new Friday the 13th featured better jumps without 3D. However, I would forgo those "jumps" to not have to deal with the lame stuff that jumps out as well.

What brought this idea to the forefront of my brain was Coraline. It seems as if I am in the minority of not enjoying the movie, but it goes beyond just being a fairly boring movie. Right in the beginning of the movie there is a cool needle 3D effect. Then, for an hour and 40 minutes I get nothing worth a damn. Sure, the colors are pretty, but the colors would be just as pretty without the annoying glasses. On top of that, there were times I took the glasses off and the screen was not blurry, so I paid extra for a movie that was not even fully in 3D. What kind of crap is that? This spring I refuse to watch Monsters vs. Aliens in 3D and in the summer, I will watch Up the old school way. The only way to get rid of 3D is to not support the technology.

I understand resisting this change makes me seem old and crabby, but there was a reason 3D came and went 2 other times! It can work for horror movies and maybe for kid movies, but even then, I just do not need it. Movies are just fine as is. I do not reject technology that can enhance storytelling or character. I have embraced every kind of CGI there is. I have no problem with it when it works. I just have not seen a viable reason for 3D movies. I know the idea of 3D will always be a spectacle and used for spectacle movies, but I like spectacle movies! I cannot wait for Final Destination 4, but I do not really want to watch it in 3D. There is not really any surprise to 3D. I know that things are flying at me and I have a pretty good idea of what those things will be.

In closing, I am not out to convert people to the anti 3D movement. I understand people are too stupid to sit and watch intelligent movies and need this extra stimulation. I know kids will be amused by the things coming at them, but I think 3D has a place. It is called Disneyland. I do not bring my complex plotted movies to Disneyland, so keep your Disneyland out of my movie theaters. it is that simple!

Incredibad - The Lonely Island

It has been a while since I have done an album review, but I like the idea of going track by track. This is kind of an odd album because it is a comedy album, first and foremost and it is full of shorter songs and some skits. However, it is music and I am going to tackle it as such. For those who do not know who The Lonely Island(TLI) are, they are a trio of white kids, who started on-line then ended up on SNL. Andy Samburg is the face of the group and TLI are responsible for all of the digital shorts on SNL. That is to say, they are all the idea of these three guys. Okay, here goes:

1. Who said we're wack- The guys jump right into the album with a pulse pounding beat and a hilarious rap track making fun of all rapper who take themselves too seriously. The idea of the song is that someone called their group "wack" and the proceed to use the word "wack" over and over again. The song ends with a very nice joke that still makes me giggle. 4/5

2. Santana DVX- Apparently Carlos Santana made some alcohol and this is an ode to that alcohol. The beat is pretty funky and the three guys drop some pretty good rhymes over it. It is a really funny satire on the alcohol influenced rap songs that are far too prevalent in the culture. E-40 shows up as a Carlos Santana and actually drops a pretty good verse. The beat really fits with him. 4/5

3. Jizz in my pants- This is a Euro club song, that starts like it is going to be a serious song and then quickly unwinds into some pretty serious hilarity. TLI boys have the perfect delivery for this track and the whole song sounds like it could be in a club. I really love just how over the top the song gets towards the end. Seeing the video for it really helps, but the song stands on its own. Be warned though, you will find yourself randomly singing the song at the wrong times. 5/5

4. I'm on a boat- I have a problem with this song because T-Pain is on it. however, he is perfect on it because the entire song plays as a parody of a T-Pain song. Boasting about being on a boat gets funnier as the song goes on and it really points to how ridiculous rappers are with their vehicles. Plus, it really is catchy as hell. I want to deny it, but I can't. 4.5/5

5. Sax man- Jack Black's funniest performance ever is on this little song/skit. I die laughing every time as Jack Black sings as a guy who is trying to get a saxophone guy to play, but I do not want to ruin the joke. It is definitely one of the funniest tracks on the album. I love the sax sounds, so much. I giggle like a school girl. 5/5

6. Lazy Sunday- If you have not heard this by now, you must be a newborn. This is what started the TLI explosion. Chris Parnell is featured and the raps on this song are so good they actually show more talent than most rappers these days "Call us Aaron Burr from the way we're droppin Hamiltons" Game Over bitches! The fact that the whole Beastie Boys style song is about a PG movie makes it only that much funnier. 5/5

7. Normal Guy(interlude)- The first lull in the album. I am not amused by a not normal guy trying to pass as normal. The premise is unfunny and the delivery does not help matters. At this point I worry the charm is gone. 0/5

8. Boombox- I am glad I heard this song because it lets me know of the dangers of the boombox. It features a dumb reference to boiled goose in every verse, which is distracting, but the song is pretty damn funny and again, very catchy. The beat is really dope, but for a song about a boombox, I was hoping it would be more booming oh and the hook totally sounds like it could be sung by One Republic or something. Plus any song that says "It was a rainbow coalition of dancing" deserves high marks 4/5

9. Shrooms(interlude)- Like so many stand up comedians when they try and use skits, these are just not funny. Perhaps you have had to do shrooms to really find the humor here, but it is lost on me. 0/5

10. Like a boss- This song is hilarious the first time, pretty funny the second time and then just kind of annoying. I like how silly it is because of how many rap songs it is playing off of, but I kind of got tired of the whole thing. It wraps up nicely in the end, but there is only so much I can take of "like a boss" before I want to just hit skip. There is some funny stuff here, but it just gets old too quickly. The beat is very hot though. I mean, I can hear a lot of rappers trying to rap over it. 3/5

11. We like Sportz- Here is a perfect example of what makes these guys work. They are totally awkward, but they know exactly how to use it to mine laughs. Here is a song about loving sports, but it really plays like 2 guys who are trying to prove they are manly because they are scared someone will think they are gay. It is the perfect frat boy song and it works as a rap song because of how manly rappers claim to be all of the time. 4.5/5

12. Dreamgirl- Here we have one of the weakest songs of the album. I understand what it is meant to do, but it just seems too generic. Rappers like to make songs that talk about the perfect girl and these guys want to do it too, but to make it funny they talk about a super ugly girl! SOOO FUNNY! They do get half a point higher for having Norah Jones singing the lovely hook with the seriousness you would expect from Norah Jones. 2.5/5

13. Ras Trent- I did not at all get this song the first few times. It is hard to pay attention to the words with the ridiculous accent and the too loud horns on the beat, but when you actually pay attention, it is funny funny stuff. Now, I do not know any white guys who think they are rastas, but I know they exist and this is a nice satire of those guys. Granted, the whole thing is just a play on an old Jimmy Fallon sketch, but it works here. Sandburg's voice on the track just kills me. 4/5

14. Dick in a box- What else can be said about this brilliant song. Here is a nice detour from rap satires to satire boy bands from the 90s. It is about time those guys get made fun of. Again, the comic satire is effective because Sandburg and Justin Timberlake are taking the whole very seriously. Comedy only comes from people who truly believe in what they are doing. 5/5

15. Old Saloon- I really think this is only for actual rap fans because the song is the perfect take on DJs and gun shots all over the track making it too difficult to actually hear the track. it is only a minute long so it does not over stay it's welcome, which is nice. I cannot really hear the actual song, but I am sure it is pure silliness. 4/5

16. Punch you in the Jeans- The track sounds like a Jurassic 5 song, with some nonsensical lyrics about punching jeans. The lyrics are actually pretty funny and really show these guys listen to a lot of rap because they spit nonsense that sounds dope, but if you pay attention you realize it makes no sense. For example "I'm gonna turn your 501s into 499s. It sounds dope in the song, but really it means absolutely nothing. It is one of the stronger tracks all the way around 5/5

17. Space Olympics- I skip this track every time. It sucks and should have been left on the cutting room floor, or whatever the music version of the cutting room floor is. It is futuristic sounding, yes but I just do not care about any of this autotune nonsense, even in a comedy track.

18. Natalie's rap- Natalie Portman reimagined as a gangster rapper who cheated her way through college is pure genius, seriously. I cannot get over how amazing it is to hear Natalie Portman talk about weed and sex with the foulest mouth. To be honest, it works so much better with the video, but the song mostly works. It is a very Easy-E style song, which is a really nice touch as well. 5/5

19- Incredibad- If you were wondering how TLI came to be, here is your song. It is very Beastie Boys sounding, but they are rapping about having sex with an alien to save that alien's race. It is so goofy, but it totally works because of how committed the guys are, plus the beat is so freaking off the hook it is almost a shame it is being used on such a funny song. It really ties up the album perfectly. 5/5

It is rare that I can listen to something comedic over and over as I listen to regular music, but the production and the comedy are both so strong, I can actually listen to this mixed in with other music with no issues. If you have not seen their videos go over to Hulu and check them out, but these guys are pretty much the real deal as far as rap fans and rap satirists. I know they got some real producers and of course, artists, but I hope for good things from these guys in the future. I am really glad I picked this album up. I am hesitant to give credit to Robbie, but he was pumping them up so much, I did buy it because of it. So thanks Robbie. This does not, however, let you off the hook for LXG.

JCVD

In our world, fallen actors can easily find a place in reality television. Some host competitions and some just end up as contestants on shows. Even academy award winning actresses end up in dancing shows(Marlee Matlin). Jean Claude Van Damme(JCVD) took a different route. He started making movies outside of the country to be aired on The USA network. He was getting paid very little for the movies, but they are huge sellers outside of this country. However, he is a has-been to us in the states. He will also be a classic action guy, top-lining some crazy awesome action movies in the 80s and early 90s. I was always a fan. I liked that he did almost everything with his hands and feet. Plus, he brought Jon Woo over to our country. Do not be fooled, without Jean Claude Van Damme, Jon Woo might not have been convinced to come to our country and make the classic Face/Off. With all of this in mind, when I heard JCVD was making a movie where he played himself, I was all for it!

Tax problems and a custody battle have left JCVD in desperate need of money. He just lost a role to Steven Segal because Segal was going to cut his pony tail for the role and so JCVD, decides he needs to get away from America for a while and head home. As soon as he lands back in Brussels, he heads to a post office/bank hybrid and is immediately involved in a hostage/bank robbery situation. Everyone outside thinks he is the one who is doing the bank robbery, but we know he is merely a hostage. What makes the whole thing interesting, is that JCVD is not looking to be a hero. He is playing a version of himself, but he is not concerned with being a hero. He just wants to survive. The heist-men use JCVD to try and get what they want, which is what makes people outside even more convinced it is JCVD doing the bad deeds. It would make sense, because he has no money. One of the heist-men is a big JCVD fan which leads to a lot of funny "insider" dialog and gives JCVD a chance to get some things off his chest. JCVD takes advantage of the situation by negotiating. he lets a hostage go when the city wires money to his account, but in the end, things do not always work out the way you want.

As the opening credits fly by the screen, we are watching a pretty kick ass action sequence being shot, in what looks like one continuous shot. When the scene ends, JCVD says "I cannot do this in one take. I am 48 now." Therein lies the problem with being an aging action star trying to act in movies directed by young guys. Stallone has found a way out of that: he directs himself. From these opening moments, the movie goes into a dizzying series of flashbacks, flash forwards and half scenes. It takes a bit to adjust to the idea of JCVD in a movie with a dramatic flair for time bending, but it works. I like that we see how the hostage situation goes down, only after we know there is a hostage situation. I like that in between the present scenes we cut back to his Hollywood life, to show us how JCVD even got to this point in his life.

Some might say that JCVD is merely a vanity project for JCVD; I disagree. There is a moment when JCVD is practically begging for the bank to give him money because he is so broke. He is pretending not to be broke, but he is begging for it. This is JCVD's version of reality television. He is playing only a version of himself, but it is JCVD. he is the man complaining that studios are making a killing off of him while he makes the minimum. He is the guy who deep down wants to make better movies, but needs to make money. During the courtroom scene, his ex-wife's attorney holds up all of JCVD's movies and says JCVD must be a bad father. It is played for semi laughs, but it is an interesting idea. Can a man make violent movies for a living and raise a normal healthy child? Of course, he can, but we live in a world when we are looking for media related scapegoats and JCVD becomes an easy target. Am I reading that scene deeper than is meant? Probably, yes, but it is there and it has to be there for a reason.

The last thing I want to mention is the monologue. As JCVD is sitting in a chair being held hostage and discussing what happened in his career, the movie pauses, the wall behind him falls down (a literal breaking of the wall) and we see lighting fixtures and we know this is JCVD as JCVD. The camera stays right on his face the entire time and the man goes into a monologue about the film industry, about him and about the culture of America. It is a beautifully written, excellently delivered monologue and it shows that perhaps JCVD got a bit of a raw deal in our country. yes, he made his bed full of blood sport and double impact and he had to lay in it, but the man has an ability to act. Now, the whole movie is in his native tongue, so he speaks it much more clearly than he does English, so that helps, yes. Yet, it is his passion, his voice and his emotion that shines through.

I highly doubt this movie is going to lead to JCVD setting the comeback trail ablaze. It was a little seen movie and it has subtitles and only features JCVD doing stunts in about 5 to 7 minutes of the 97 minute run time. It is a funny and touching movie that is a nice inside look at the possible life of an actor at the low point in his career. I respect the hell out of what JCVD did during his time as an action star and I respect him more for his performance in this movie. I hope the monologue becomes like a cultish movie scene that people talk about for years to come. it really is that good.

Final Grade: B

After 350 posts, some changes in how this will go.

Recently, I have found myself less interested in just writing reviews of the new movies I see and I am not sure if the readership is still up, so I thought I would make some changes to how I do things, mostly in an attempt to keep myself interested. I am going to start updating 5-6 days a week, using different days for different thing.

Sunday: I am going to use this day as my TV day. I will probably do something like pick my 5 favorite moments or episodes from the week. The shows I watch and will most likely feature are: Big Bang Theory, How I met your Mother, Chuck, 24, Trust me, Scrubs, Lost, Grey's Anatomy, Supernatural, Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles, Dollhouse, Friday Night Lights and The L Word. It is possible American Idol might sneak in, as well. Not sure what summer TV will look like, though.

Monday and Tuesday: These days will continue to be prime days for writing new reviews. Of course, this is dependent on actually seeing movies, so in some weeks these might be off or at least light. On average, I would say I see at least two movies in the theater per week, but not always. I may use these days to review any new movies on DVD that I missed in theaters as well. If I get back into buying new music, I may review music on these days as well.

Wednesday: This is going to be a wild card day, which means there will be a variety of things I deal with on this day. Sometimes it may be a rant, or an essay, or random thoughts about movies. I may use this to talk about thoughts on casting news. Sometimes I might review a favorite movie of mine, or a movie I hate, just for fun.

Thursday: Here is my throwback day. I have asked a very good friend, Robbie, to give me 15 movies released before 1990 that he would like me to review. After I review those 15, I may ask someone else, or ask him for more, or if there is something anyone wants me to review, please send them my way. This is a chance for me to review some favorites from people, or interesting movies and maybe even watch some movies I never saw. I am excited about this. The first movie will either be Porky's or Hoosiers.

Friday: This will be the day of lists. This can also be more interactive. If there is a list you would like to see me do, let me know and I will do it. These lists will usually be either "best of" actors, or favorites in a genre or something random, but I am open to all ideas.

There will be nothing on Saturday as that is typically a homework heavy day. Now, there may be weeks, where I miss some of the days due to it being midterms or if a big project is due. However, I find myself with more free time than I had imagined this semester because so much of the work spans the entire semester. I am hoping doing all of this new stuff will renew interest in the blog and renew the interest in myself to continue to do it. I hope this works out and I hope that more people will give me ideas of things to do. I really love sharing my opinions of movies because I really do love the movies!

Repo! The Genetic Opera

In the future, some weird disease has caused mass organ failure. GeneCo comes along and organ transplants become common place. They also legalize a very effective and addictive pain killer that can be stolen on the streets from the dead bodies that litter the future. GeneCo offers payment plans so you can save your life. However, if you do not keep up your payments, they can legally kill you by sending in The Repo Man to repossess your organs. Oh and it is all sung. Oh and it has Paris Hilton and Paul Sorvino in scenes together.

Mixing Sweeney Todd, violent comic books, Rock Horror Picture show, and Saw probably sounded like a good idea to some people at some point. it must have for this stage show to be turned into a movie. At some point someone finished doing a line of coke off of a midget's ass and said "Paul Sorvino as Paris Hilton's father. Make it HAPPEN!" There was a moment when someone thought casting Sarah Brightman as the blind Opera singer in this disaster would give the project a sense of gravitas. Some producer thought it would be funny for Paris Hilton to lose her face. I guess they forgot that in House of Wax Paris Hilton was impaled through the skull, which is much much cooler. Somewhere someone has incriminating photos of Anthony Stewart Head(Giles in Buffy, for God sake!) and forced him to lend his unbelievable talents to something that was destined to be a travesty against film, opera and surgery.

I have always maintained that when you try hard to look or be cool, you fail. Coolness is just something that happens. I believe the same can be said for movie of the "Cult Classic" genre. When you try too hard to give yourself cult classic status, you usually fall flat on your face. This is one of those times. Ed Wood never set out to make Plan 9 a cult classic, it just happened. That is how the world works. By putting Paul Sorvino as some warbling, talk singing maniac, you do not assure yourself cult classic status. Repo! is missing that key factor. It is missing that special something to be a classic in some sense. Repo! is the kind of movie I hope to forget very soon. I cannot even be coaxed into purchasing the soundtrack when the movie was over. There was farrrrr too much talk singing. I think if you have music going and you talk your dialog in a kind of rhythm, that does not make it an opera.

Final words: Robbie Blake, screw you for subjecting me to this nonsense.

Final grade: F

Inkheart

The only reason I would ever see this movie is if I had to kill some time because something happened with plans. Well, it happened, so I was stuck to choose between Inkheart and the third Underworld movie. Seeing as how I turned off the first Underworld movie about 30 minutes in, the choice was simple. I would go watch Brenden Frasier play a variation of the same character he has played in most of his movies. He was so good in his role on Scrubs, you would think he could do more challenging work, but here he is in a young person movie full of CGI.

Mo(Frasier) is a "silver tongue," which is to say that when he reads books out loud, the things he reads show up in the real world. It sounds like it could be cool, but every time he does it, someone near him ends up being transferred into the world of the book. Nine years ago was the last time he did it because it sent his wife into a book called Inkheart. He has spent the last nine years searching for another copy of that rare book to try and read her back out. On his tail is Dustfinger(Paul bettany), a guy who can make fire with his hands. Dustfinger is a character from Inkheart that he read out and Dustfinger desperately wants to get back home. Also, Capricorn(Andy Serkis) is trying to catch Mo because Capricorn's silver tongue stutters and so things come out weird. Capricorn wants to bring the main villain from Inkheart, The Shadow, out into our world. Mo, Dustfinger, Mo's daughter, and Mo's mother in Law(Helen Mirren) must ban together to try and stop this travesty from happening.

I am not going to lie, this movie only had about 75% of my attention. The rest of the time my mind was wandering through the perils of student life. That is not necessarily a knock against the movie, I had pre-conceived notions going in that may have been a deciding factor. Brenden Frasier, who usually brings all kinds of energy to these types of movies, looked and played bored most of the time. He can usually at least make a funny face or goofily deliver a line to save a scene but here he cannot seem to be bothered to care, so why should we? Mirren is completely wasted in that typical eccentric old woman role and Andy Serkis is completely 1-note as the cardboard cut-out villain. The only actors who seem to be trying are Paul bettany, whose Dustfinger is perfectly tortured and self-serving and Jim Broadbent as the author of Inkheart. Both men actually give performances worthy of the big screen and Bettany's emotional quest is the only real connection an audience can find.

That being said, the effects are pretty cool, especially the twister scene inspired from The Wizard of Oz. The storm is nice and chase scene it inspires is kind of cool. Also, the climax is pretty cool. The Shadow looks very cool and again, a nice storm looking thing happens. The story is semi interesting, I guess, but I am not sure what I am supposed to take away from it. Is reading out loud dangerous? Will it inspire someone to be an author because they can literally bring their characters to life? Are the consequences of such a thing worth it? During the whole movie, all I could think about was how Mo's daughter had never been read aloud to. That made me sad because for a child to be read to is important. It made me think "No wonder she is so screwed up." I could totally be missing the point, but those are the things I thought.

Final Grade: C-

He's just not that into you

Romantic comedies rarely produce trailers good enough to make me interested in them. If I go to one, it is usually just because I like someone in it, or I have someone who wants to go and I am willing to see most movies. Rarely does a romantic comedy provide enough laughs in the trailer to warrant even semi-excitement for me. This one did, though. The cast certainly helps. Littering a movie with impossibly beautiful women is always a plus, but there were laughs in the trailer and often times that translates into laughs during the movie. However, when it comes to the rom-com genre I have two reactions- love or hate. The only time I can remember coming out in between was 27 Dresses. With a steep hill to climb, I went to my theater on opening night to take the movie in the way it was meant to be taken in: with a theater full of single women.

I am not going to bother with a detailed summary because, frankly, it would be too confusing. Instead I will list characters and their relation to each other.

Gigi(Jinnfer Goodwin)- Our narrator. Went on a date with Connor, works with Beth and Janine and meets Alex who tells her to stop pining after guys who do not want her.
Conor(Kevin Connely)- Stuck on Anna, friends with Alex and uses Mary to help him out with work.
Anna(Scarlett Johansson)- Using Conor to feel good about herself, friends with Mary, desires the married Ben.
Ben(Bradley Cooper)- Married to Janine, flirting with Anna and friends with Neil.
Neil(Ben Affleck)- In a relationship with Beth, but does not believe in marriage, friends with Ben.
Beth(Jennifer Aniston)- Loves Neil but wants marriage. Works with Janine and Gigi
Janine(Jennifer Connelly)- Unhappily married to Ben and works with Beth and Gigi.
Mary(Drew Berrymore)- Friends with Anna and knows Conor, is trying to use technology to find a man.

Coming in at just over two hours, "He's Just" manages pretty successfully to weave all of these characters together in telling a whole bunch of complex stories. None of the people in the movie are treated very kindly by the script or filmmakers and at times, the awkward Gigi stuff is so awkward, you want to turn away from this poor girl. Gigi is our point of view character. She narrates our story and seems to be the emotional center of the story. As Gigi, Jinnfer Goodwin is about the most adorable a person has ever been, but she is also a mental case. She is desperate for love and affection, as is every character in the movie, to some extent. Her scenes with Alex are probably the most complete scenes in the movie because they most exactly get to the point of the story: Girls need to stop making excuses for guys and for each other. The fundamental theme of the story is that if a guy likes you he will let you know. This theme hinges on something guys have known all along- we are not complicated beings. We do not have subliminal thoughts. If we like you, you will know because we are not complicated enough for mind games. It is a semi-flawed premise but in the context of the film it mostly works.

The acting ranges from incredibly strong(Jennifer Connelly) to boring(Justin Long) to just downright off(Scarlett Johansson). However, story wise, Jennifer Aniston and Ben Affleck have the most interesting story. They both do a good job, with Affleck in more of a cameo role, but their story, I think, has the most emotional resonance. I have been waiting for Bradley Cooper to have his break out role, but I do not think this is it either. I think he is destined to play kind of slimy guys in movies, which is too bad because on television he has done some strong work. Kevin Connelly is serviceable as the love sick puppy dog following Johansson, but it cannot be too difficult to play that. Drew Berrymore has an interesting role because she is the most cliche of characters, but she is also the most culturally relevant. She is surrounded by the stereotypical "gaybestfriend" yet she is the one trying to change with the times by iChatting and getting dates off of Myspace(A little dated, I know).

The comedy comes in random bursts usually and most of the comedy is not found within the stories, but in the random "interviews" with people. As a kind of odd framing structure, after a scene depicting something from the book, the screen goes black and white text comes across the scene like "If he's not calling you." Then, they segue into some interviews with random people that tell stories that revolve around that text statement. Those moments offer some of the funnier moments because they feel real. In fact, the movie is trying to frame itself in some sort of reality. It wants to say that guys are not always the people from the movies, where they change or reveal a layer underneath that proves they are heartfelt and good. This presents a problem though, because, after all, it is a rom-com. Not only is it a fantasy, it uses a 1980s movie to push the movie forward, causing the movie to throw out this idea of reality. In the end, the good guys are all happy, except 1 and the two "villains" are alone, which is unlike real life.

In the end, I think I can put this rom-com in that rare 27 Dresses category. I liked it, but did not love it. I wanted to love it. I thought it was funny, but in the final 10 minutes take forever to get things wrapped up, which is a problem with ensemble stories like this. I thought the movie took the cheap way out in the end, which was disappointing because for 100 minutes it was actually kind of raw and funny. I understand things are supposed to be sweet and in the end, the girls want the sweet happy ending to provide comfort, but it seems to go against everything the title implies. Sometimes you don't find love where you hope to find it after all it is possible that "He's just not that into you."

Final Grade: B-

Last Chance Harvey

I often daydream and in those daydreams I have a reoccurring dream. I dream I meet someone in a foreign land and we spend 24 hours doing everything there is to do in that location and all the while we are talking about everything that could possibly be discussed. We agree and we disagree and we learn everything we could possibly learn about each other because this will be our only time together, so why hold secrets or why pull punches. When the 24 hours are over, we share a good bye kiss and I fly away. I actually fly because these are my dreams after all. Who needs planes in dreams? I was reminded of this dream while watching Last Chance Harvey unfold.

Harvey Shine never(Dustin Hoffman) made it as a Jazz pianist. He wasn't good enough. Instead he writes jingles and scores commercials. He is a sad man, who is going to lose his job, but he has to fly off to London for his daughter's wedding. Kate Walker(Emma Thompson)is a lonely woman with a meddling mother and a bad job. She tries dating but it never works for her. The two people meet briefly in the airport in London, but share only a few rude remarks back and forth. Harvey tells his daughter that he cannot stay for the reception, but will be there for the wedding and in turn his daughter tells him she wants her step-dad to give her away. It is not spoken in this moment, but Harvey and his daughter have issues. As Harvey struggles to get to his flight after the wedding, he is fired. He is out of chances. He is an old man in an industry that is getting younger. Depressed, Harvey goes to the airport bar and starts drinking. It is there he and Kate find each other and strike up a lovely meet-cute. From the airport, Harvey follows Kate to her writing class and then they just walk and talk. They have lovely conversations and serious conversations and in one of those serious ones, Kate convinces Harvey to go back to his daughter's reception, but he will only go if she will. The pair has a blast and promise to meet the next day at noon the next day. Will it happen? Will fate step in?

I am not sure why, but I loved this movie. I am not sure if it was just what I needed today, or something else, but I found myself totally immersed in this slow moving character study of two people finding each other in the most random of circumstances. The movie asks questions about mortality and fate and shows that happiness is possible no matter where you are in life. The performances from Hoffman and Thompson are perfectly whimsical but grounded in a light sense of reality. Hoffman gets a chance to break your heart and Thompson gets to do it as well, in the end. I enjoyed the simple story telling and the classy dialog that aided in moving the story along. The movie is not story driven, but the story is interesting. There is a nice flow to the scenes and to the relationships between everyone. I know Hoffman is at least 20 years older than Thompson, but they had a nice and easy chemistry and it was not hard believing they could find each other and strike up this sort of romantic friendship. I do believe it is friendship above all else. These are two people helping each other into new eras of life and it takes a friend to do such things.

I go back to my daydream and wonder, in this day and age of facebook, texting, twitter and everything else, if something like that is possible. Maybe Last Chance Harvey is there to show me that it doesn't have to end. We can have in depth conversations with almost strangers and still be able to continue on in our lives together. Maybe it is those in depth conversations that strengthen these new bonds. This kind of unknowing trust is the foundation to make big leaps of faith or lead to the winds of change in life. Either way, Last Chance Harvey is a wonderful movie I hope more people find on video.

Final Grade: B+

Taken

It all started with the trailer. There was this moment I had to see. I saw it in the trailer, but I needed to see it how it was meant to be seen. I needed to witness Liam Neeson calmly but intensely saying "I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you." That was all I needed.

Bryan Mills(Neeson) spent a long time as a "prevention agent" for The American government. He retired to finally get close to his daughter, Kim, something he could not do while preventing things. His daughter(Maggie Grace), though, wants to go to Paris with a friend for the summer. Bryan does not like it but relents, under conditions. The first condition being she must call him the second she lands. She forgets. He gets nervous. He keeps calling her. Kim and her friend met a cute guy at the airport. Her friend told the boy too much information. Next thing you know, Kim calls daddy just in time to be kidnapped. With just a voice to go on, Bryan calls a friend from his old job and he finds out a whole lot. He is on a plane and soon people are dying. We are given a 96 hour timeline, because, well, deadlines are important in action movies. They make the movies feel more intense and just a bit crazier.

Taken is another entry into the new style of action movie where all the fighting is minimal and there is not a whole lot of emotion in the fighting. It takes a seemingly unlikely male, Liam Neeson and turns him into a total bad ass and Neeson wears it well. Decked out in long black coats and rarely letting his voice rise above a Jack Bauer inspired whisper yell. In fact, the Jack Bauer, or 24 similarities do not end there. The plot unfolds very much like 24, where who we think is the main villain dies because there is someone else who is the main villain and so on like that. Eventually the movie lands itself on a boat, where Neeson is really quite impressive in his actioning.

The movie is very frenetically paced and you are not going to get lost in it and perhaps the pacing moves so quickly to keep you from questioning things, but I enjoyed the ride. I like that Neeson straight up shoots people without warning and I like that electricity is used int he most brutal ways. I was totally into the car chase in the sand dunes and was willing to believe 1 man can take down an entire sex trade ring, especially if that man is Liam Neeson. If nothing else I learned that a real bad ass knows the difference of an unloaded and a loaded gun just by the weight.

Final Grade: B-

Mall Cop, Notorious, The Unborn, The Reader, My Bloody Valentine

So, I kind of lost my interest in this for a little bit, but I think I am ready to go back to it, but I am not really going to go back and review everything I have seen since I last wrote a review, so I am going to do a few shorter reviews here.

Paul Blart: Mall Cop

I enjoy Kevin James as a stand up comedian and this movie is was a shot for him to become a big screen comedian. He mostly pulls it off in regards to being a safe contrast to the R-rated comedies so prevalent these days. The movie takes a little while to get going, but it has enough laughs and even a nice explosion to keep it interesting. I enjoyed the two plot twists as I did not see them coming and James shows he can carry a movie with his nice guy gimmick.

Notorious

There was always something about The Notorious B.I.G that did it for me. The man was so smooth on stage and his verbal gymnastics were spectacular. I am surprised a movie about him got made, but I am glad it did. It will not change anyone's mind about rap music or even on the man himself, but for fans it was a nice tribute to man I grew to really admire in some way. He was so sure of himself in his songs, but he always had a hint of sadness and his stories were at times hilarious and then violent and sometimes even both. The movie does him justice, even if they missed some key moments.

The Unborn
I walked out an hour in, which says a lot because I even sat through every Saw movie. This is another addition to the PG-13 ghost story genre, but this movie weaves Nazi mythology, pagan mythology and an incredibly sexy girl. What I did love about the movie was that it would have a scene that made no sense and before you could realize it, they would give you a scene with the sexy girl in the shower. Note to all makers of movies that make no sense: More hot girl in shower scenes will cure your problems.

The Reader

I should have done a full review of this because I am still thinking about the movie, but it requires a dialogue not a review. The performances are very strong and I love movies full of moral ambiguities. The story spans decades and the framing device SUCKS, but other than that, it is a very good movie. Plus, there is a section full of naked Kate Winslett which is never a bad thing.

My Bloody Valentine

It is hard to fault a movie that marketed itself as this kind of throw back campy slasher flick. Well, it would be hard to fault it if it followed its own marketing. Sadly, the movie took itself entirely too seriously minus a scene that follows a fully nude girl running and hiding from the killer. That was meant to be funny, but the rest was too serious. The 3D aspects offered a killer jump and a few smaller jumps, but I think I was hoping it would just be more fun. I enjoyed the twist at the end, but mostly because the people around me could not figure out what was going on and that amused me.

2008 end of the year BLOW OUT!

I know I am late with this, but I was really wanting t0 wait until I had seen everything I believed would end up on my top list. I hope the lateness does not deter people from reading it. I am not sure how much longer I will really continue updating this blog, but we shall see. Anyway, what follows is my end of the year stuff: favorites, least favorites, surprises and whatnot.

My Ten Favorite movies of 2008

10. Forgetting Sarah Marshall- This was my favorite straight up comedy of the year. It made me laugh from beginning to end and there were singing vampire puppets!

9. Frost/Nixon- Amazing acting and writing and somehow made an interview crazy intense. It found a way to make me feel sympathy for Richard Nixon

8. Milk- The most relevant story of the bunch. It has great acting and a tremendous heart. Sean Penn throws himself into the role and everyone around him follow suit.

7. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button- An impressive marriage of intimate and epic. Brad Pitt gives the performance of his career and the technical side of the movie will change the way CG is used.

6. In Bruges- I loved this nice little surprise of a movie. It is funny, politically incorrect, featured a few cool shoot outs and gave Colin Ferrell the best performance of his career. I really hope more people find this little gem.

5. Slumdog Millionaire- I expected nothing out of this story, but it moved me and made me, even if briefly, believe in the idea of fate. It never feels false and it somehow makes beauty out of an ugly situation. It is a moving and powerful story.

4. The Wrestler- Heart breaking in so many ways, this is an intimate and tragic story, with a big heart and a powerhouse performance from the most unlikely of sources. It is really a movie about love and going out on your own terms. Live the life you want to live!

3. Wall-E- I cannot believe how amazing I found this movie. It is a gorgeous love story, a sweeping sci-fi epic and a message film all rolled up into one. Plus, Wall-E is soooo damn cute. How could you not fall in love with the little robot who wants nothing more than to hold hands with something?

2. The Dark Knight- I cannot say anything else about this movie that has not already been said. It is a moving, violent, sweeping and manic movie that makes superhero movies look good. I wonder how the pessimism of Gotham City will look under the new administration.

1. Rachel Getting Married- This is somewhat of a sentimental choice, I admit that, but I was so unbelievably moved by this suffocating family struggle. The way music and cameras are used to further the story only made things more intimate and interesting. I cried my way through it and when it was over, I wanted to believe in love and change.

The Next Five (11-15)- Tropic Thunder, Redbelt, Valkyrie, Ironman, Revolutionary Road

The 10 worst movies of 2008

10. Twilight- This movie carried hype, otherwise, it might have just been some forgettable movie I saw once and it would not have made this list. It sucked. The romance sucked, the action sucked, the effects sucked and the music sucked. If you liked this movie you are just flat out wrong.

9. The Mummy 3- Pointless sequel alert!! This was a mess from beginning to end and having Yetis that somehow understand Chinese and Yetis that have a sense of humor did nothing to help matters. This was also plagued with bad CGI.

8. Mamma Mia- I am still trying to forget I ever saw this garbage. Meryl Streep is not one for musical comedy and it was sad to watch her try. It was an uninspired movie, with one good sequence and a bunch of hot people, but still a waste of time and money.

7. Prom Night- Characters is slasher flicks have to be a bit stupid for a movie to exist, but this movie is full of the stupidest characters doing the stupidest things. I hated this thing so much because I just wanted them all to die of stupidity.

6. Speed Racer- This was probably the biggest disappointment for me this year. I wanted to like it but it was a disaster. The colors got headache worthy pretty early on, and the story did nothing to save it!

5. Saw V- It is not every year that a Saw movie does not end up in my worst 3 list, which means this was either not as a bad as the other ones or this yr just had more worse movies. You can pick whichever you like.

4. Punisher: War Zone- Gore, blood and bullets can help make a movie better, but if the movie is awful, they cannot change that. This was awful in every way imaginable. It should have gone right into the DVD bin.

3. Bangkok Dangerous- Such a string of pointless cliches tied together into a movie. Nic Cage has awful hair, again, and his acting is even worse. I am not sure what the point of it all was, I just know I was glad when everyone was dead.

2. In the Name of the King- I was so sure this would be number 1. I guess it should thank number 1 for coming out. I guess it is fitting that this is number 2 because it is a big steaming pile of crap.

1. The Love Guru- Words cannot even fully describe just how bad this movie is. Superlatives do not exist with enough gusto to properly place this movie in the right amount of suck. Actually let me try, if this movie had been released in the same year as Pirates of the Caribbean 3, this would have been the worst movie and not Pirates, which is saying something.

S0 there it is my 2008 wrap up. It is time to look forward to The Oscars and then of course, to 2009. Please let me know what some of your favorites of 2008 were, unless you just want to talk about how amazing Twilight was. In that case, just keep it to yourself, no one needs to know that. :-)

Revolutionary Road

Before I walked into the auditorium of this movie, I saw a friend who was also going to watch this movie. We were commiserating that perhaps watching a depressing movie while we were jointly depressed was not such a good idea. Then he said that maybe it would provide a sort of catharsis and it could cleanse the soul to cry. I think that is what I was hoping for all along. When I saw Rachel Getting Married, that is what happened. I felt terrible going in, cried a lot and felt better when the whole thing was over. I did not get my catharsis in The Wrestler, even though I had just watched it, so I was kind of hoping to get it from a movie about a very unhappy couple. That was my mind set going in. Iw as expecting sadness and I was expecting tears. I needed sadness and I needed tears. Perhaps that is too much pressure to put on a movie and to put on myself. I find that when you expect to cry, you can force the tears and that does no one good. Perhaps I was expecting too much? I had no idea what to expect, really.

Frank and April meet one night at a party. he is fresh from the war and spending time in France. She is studying to be an actress. The next moment, they have been married for 9 years and she was just in a miserable community play. Frank and April proceed to have a knock down drag out fight on the side of the road. The kind of fight movie couples have at the end of the movies, not at the beginning. It leaves them both rattled. The next day Frank cheats, while April tries to fix things. She remembers when they moved into the suburbs. She feels trapped. She believes Frank feels trapped. She knows what to do; she will move them and their two kids to France where she will work and he will find himself because he is miserable in his job. With that decided the couple finds happiness again. All the have to do is make it through the summer and then they will be gone. No one understands them. Everyone believes they are a perfect couple. When you live in the perfect house, have two kids and make good money, is that not the American Dream? Things are far from perfect and a few things keep Frank and Alice from moving. Alice gets pregnant, again and Frank gets a promotion and raise, and he thinks he is supposed to take it. He needs to provide for his family. he cannot have a child born in France. Their unhappiness spills over immensely. She cheats, he cheats again. He tells her he cheated and she asks him why he told her. He responds in some inane way and they explode yet again. With all of this going, everyone continues to think they are perfect, until they are not perfect anymore.

I did not find the catharsis I was seeking from Revolutionary Road because I did not find the tears. The movie is one of the relentlessly depressing movies like Requiem for a Dream, Leaving Las Vegas or The Fall. When it was over, I just sat in the auditorium trying to move, but feeling paralyzed by anger, by fear and by sadness. When I got to my car, I just sat there for 10 minutes wondering "why?" Why that movie? Why did those characters say those things and why did those characters do those things? What was the movie trying to say to me? Was I supposed to feel something other than rage for both of the characters? I could not figure it out? I felt like I was sitting in the front row of a play starring real life lovers as a couple who fight all of the time and at some point the characters are taken over by the actors and they are using the play to say the nastiest things to each other. I was uncomfortable the whole time. I could not sit still. I felt like I was gasping for air. I wanted the camera to move back. I wanted to get out of the house, but I couldn't because everything was just so damn interesting. I needed to know what was happening and why it was all happening. I have been sitting with this movie for about 18 hours now, and the questions still linger.

As far as the movie itself goes, everything is pretty flawless. Leonardo DeCaprio and Kate Winslet are combustible in every moment together and both are playing characters that are shallow, but they give them some kind of subtext. I was trying to read between the lines in every moment. They have an amazing chemistry on screen and they sure do look good together. Winslet was made for movies set in the 1950s. The way those outfits hug every perfect curve of hers, gives her character the outward appearance of perfection and Winslet does phenomenal work at making April far from perfect. The screenplay is brutal, but literary. The words roll of the tongue of the actors and it is smart, but it never strays from feeling realistic. There is strong supporting work from Kathy Bates as that Suburb neighbor woman and Michael Shannon shows up in two scenes as a man who has been trapped in a loony bin. He tears through his two scenes, putting to rest subtlety, in favor of blunt and loud honesty. His scenes pop and he is important to the story, but I am still not sure what I thought of him and what he really brought to the story.

Revolutionary Road is all about the show. We see pretty people in the perfect house, putting on the show of happiness, but it exposes an ugly truth. It is not a new ugly truth, but they do it very effectively. There are no good guys and no bad guys and when the whole thing is over you will wonder if something important just happened. There are two epilogue type things that I think could have been eliminated, but I understood the message behind them, I just feel emotionally it would have resonated more without them. I was emotionally detached from Frank and Alice, but was very involved with their lives. I wanted to cry for both of them, but could never figure out if they were worthy of my tears. Maybe that was not really my decision to make and perhaps I would have found my catharsis if I was not being so hyper-judgemental about Frank and Alice as a couple and as people. I guess I'll never know.

Final Grade: A-

The Wrestler

At work we often get miniature sized posters to give away to our customers. Typically we only put out the posters for movies we are actually playing, but when we got minis in for The Wrestler, I put them out anyway, because I wanted to promote the movie, even though I had not yet seen it. This kind of movie is, for the most part, lost on the general Woodland audience. This has been further confirmed by the youth of the town who see the mini posters and are trying to figure out which WWE superstar that is on the poster. How funny would it be if these kids ended up seeing the movie and got very confused as to what was going on. In fact, there is no John Cena, The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin or Hulk Hogan references to be found. There are real wrestlers in the movie, but they are has beens or never weres. People like K-Kwik and other low level guys who are cameoing it up in Darren Aronofsky's latest film.

Randy "The Ram" Robinson(Mickey Rourke) was quite a big deal as a wrestler in the 1980s. He was a super power. However, 20 years later, The Ram is no longer on top. He is still wrestling, but he is wrestling in high school gyms and small auditoriums. He gets paid in cash and often it is not the amount he hoped because the turn out was not big enough. He is the kind of guy who cannot make enough money to keep paying rent on the mobile home. He has hearing loss and scars all over his old and broken body due to the punishment of wrestling. The kids around his trailer love him, but he is all alone. His only "friend" is an aging stripper Cassidy(Marisa Tomei), but she still makes him pay for dances because she is as broken and tapped out as he is. After a brutal hardcore match, where he had staples shot into him and glass fragments jammed into his body, The Ram suffers a heart attack. His career is over. The thing he threw himself into, was being taken from him. He is all alone, but he does not want to die alone, so he tries to get back in touch with his daughter, Stephanie(Evan Rachel Wood). He was not a good father because wrestling was everything to him. He is trying to make it up to her, but he has beaten into her years of emotional scars and will not be let off the hook easily. He works the deli counter at a local grocery store and is wasting away, trying to feel anything at all. Unfortunately the only time he feels anything is in the ring and the opportunity for a re-match with his most heated rival from the 80s has come up. It will not take place at Madison Square Garden like their last match did, but it is something. The Ram is a wrestler. He bleeds, he lives and he breathes wrestling. He needs wrestling. he needs to know there are people out there who want him and want to cheer for him.

Much has been made of Mickey Rourke's performance and it is all deserved. Who knows what kind of movie this would have been if someone else had been The Ram. The story is small, slow and requires an acute attention to detail and there are long sequences where there is no dialog at all and the role requires so much pain and who knows the pain of recapturing glory the way Rourke does? Is he playing an extension of himself? Yes, of course he is, but to watch an actor leave it all on "mat" is quite a stunning thing to watch. Rourke is funny when he needs to be and infinitely charming, which is good because he is in every scene, but he will also break your heart in the final 30 minutes and he will melt your heart when he needs to. He is an incredible talent and this is the perfect vehicle for him to show what he is capable of doing. That being said, he is matched every second of the way by Marisa Tomei. Now, I do not know any 40 yr old strippers, but my guess is Marisa is prettier than most of them, but she is void of all vanity here as a woman desperate for something, anything good to happen to her. Tomei conveys so much in her body language, even when she is not writhing around the stage naked. She matches Rourke's hopelessness and his sadness and their scenes together are quite a study in subtle acting.

Aronofsky is an odd director. I find that people either love his movies or loathe them. However, he is a very visually aware director and his movies have this flare to them. Requiem of a dream and The Fountain are both excellent movies, but they would be less so if they weren't visually stunning with colors, lights, effects and camera tricks. The Wrestler is about as far away from that as possible. The movie was shot using mostly natural light and everything is minimalistic. The camera follows The Ram wherever he goes, and the camera work is so straight forward, it is almost a documentary. Gone are Aronosky's visual tics, replaced by a bobbing and weaving camera in the style of that handheld camera so common these days. It takes a good clean director's eye to make it work and Aronofsky has pulled off quite a feat. He is set to remake Robocop next, showing he is not afraid of tackling things so diverse. He deserves much of the credit for making this movie what it is. He never rushed a shot, never rushed a scene and he was confident that his audience would allow him to tell this story in a real way. It is nice to see a movie that is not so concerned with quick jump cuts. Only in the wrestling is there a lot in the way of editing.

As for the actual wrestling, it is fantastic looking. I remember watching Ali and thinking boxing could never be filmed better than it was in that movie. You felt every punch and felt every near punch. In The Wrestler, the wrestling scenes are so intimate they are suffocating. Audience members winced at every drop, every slap and every fall. People know the outcomes of matches are rigged and much of the action is "fake" but the bumps people take are real, especially if you are not making tons of money doing it and the wrestling in the movie feels real. I know real wrestlers choreographed it and The Ram's rival used to wrestle under the name "The Cat" in WCW and The WWE, and I know Mickey Rourke trained endlessly for the wrestling and it shows. It comes out a gritty, dirty ballet worthy of the title "action sequence." Of course, the wrestling is secondary in the movie, but it is not treated as such and it makes the climax that much more satisfying.

I will not give away the ending, but I just want to say that the final shot is perfect. Much is being made about what happens or what did or did not happen, but I think those people are missing the point. It is a perfect ending to a wonderful story. I am not sure I would call this the best movie of the year, but it is definitely in the conversation. It is hard not to feel something throughout The Wrestler. We feel for the stripper, for The Ram and mostly for the man playing The Ram.

Final Grade: A

Gran Torino

First a story entitled "The Time I met Clint Eastwood." It is about, well, the time I met Clint Eastwood.

For a few years, my father, my brothers and I would go to Pebble Beach for the ProAm golf tournament. We set up shop at one hole and watch everyone come through. We were usually the first ones at the hole and as people came, we would get trapped into our spot. This was not usually a problem, but when a pro golfer hit a shot that was off and coming right towards us and there was nothing we could do. I turned away from the ball so it would not hit me, but it hit me right on my ass. It stung badly, and while the golfer was trying to figure out how to hit his ball (it ended up under a chair and blanket), I heard a voice saying "The ball hit you on the ass, huh?" I turned to the voice and had to look up to see the face and there he was, Dirty Harry in the flesh. I nodded my head and he said "Well you took like a champ" he touched my shoulder, started laughing and walked off." As he walked off, I regained my ability to move and think and I thought about it and realized, Dirty Harry had just touched me, had just made a joke at my expense and I was still scared of him! The man is walking danger. If ever there was a man at over 70 years old who could make a movie about an old man killing some young gang bangers it is him.

Watch the trailer before going further:


I start with the trailer because my review is going to discuss the trailer, possibly at length. It will not become common practice for me to use the trailer as my synopsis, though, so do not worry.

What the trailer shows is a movie that looks an awful like a generic revenge film, like Death Wish, Falling Down, Death Sentence or The Brave One. You see a lot of violence and guns and Clint being a bad ass. This gave me the impression that the movie was going to be a run of the mill movie with a Vietnam war vet who hates everyone else, drinks beer and shoots people. If I was not into watching all possible Oscar contenders, I never would have seen Gran Torino because of what the trailer showed me the movie was. The trailer is wrong. I cannot believe how badly marketed this film is. I mean, I understand it because it is marketed for maximum appeal, but it is not the trailer. In fact, with one exception all of the guns in the trailer make up all of the guns in the entire movie. The movie is not at all a revenge film. It is not at all generic. I was wrong when I told Robbie how basic and run of the mill it looked. But, can you blame me?

Walt Kowalski(Eastwood) is a Vietnam vet. He is a racist, he does drink beer, a lot and he hates religion, but that is only the beginning of the movie. Walt is a dying breed and he sparks a friendship with a Hmong family. A family that puts up with his horribly racist comments and a family that loves feeding him delicious food. Gran Torino is a movie that is exploring Xenophobia or what it means to be American. It is exploring what it means to be a real man and it shows political incorrectness in a world increasingly more politically correct every day. It is a sometimes funny, often times uncomfortable film with a tender center and Eastwood has done a wonderful job as a director and a good job as an actor. Yes, Walt does kick a bit of ass and he is a scary man who is not afraid of threatening people, but that is only the surface of the movie. If the trailer had focused on his budding friendship with the two Hmong children, I would have been singing a different tune. If I knew at its core, Gran Torino was discussing cultural events in a real way, or had been a movie about what being a man means, I would have been interested.

Now, as it has been discussed at great length at my job, I am not ever the target audience for the mainstream, regular guy movie goer. I saw this movie even though the trailer turned me off. I am just that guy. So, trailers are not meant to appeal to me. I am an oddity in terms of movies. However, I can be won over by trailers. I can be suckered by them (Hello, My Bloody Valentine) and I want trailers to reflect what the movies will actually be about and Gran Torino's trailer fails on a massive level. Now, the movie does not always succeed, either. I respect Clint for wanting to cast actual Hmong people, but in order to do that, he had to cast a whole bunch of non-actors and it shows. There are moments when the acting from the kids is so bad it distracted me to no end, especially around the climax. The screenplay is a bit too repetitive at times and The stuff with the young priest gets a annoying at times, although the conclusion of the Walt/Priest dynamic is nice. However, considering what I expected, I was pleasantly surprised by Gran Torino and I can respect what it was trying to do.

Final Grade: B+

Frost/Nixon

If only two people could be nominated for an award together. That would be the perfect scenario with Frost/Nixon. Frank Langella as Richard Nixon gets the big showy performance with an incredible monologue during one off the most powerful phone call conversations to be captured on film and Langella deserves all of the accolades coming his way as he gives us a Richard Nixon who is smart, funny, nasty and accountable. However, Michael Sheen as David Frost is every bit as good. He does not have the big Oscar moments, but his performance is a study in nuance and subtlety and he is just as deserving. Together, though, they are a whole other animal. Each of their scenes pop with energy, intensity and if there was a way for them to be nominated as a collective, it would serve them both nicely.

David Frost is a playboy talk show host with dreams of interviewing Richard Nixon right after Nixon resigned the presidency. No network believes it will happen and Frost has to try and raise the money and conduct the interview. He hires a "crack investigative" team to help research and plan and they land the interview. The interview takes place over 4 2 hour sessions, spread out over a few weeks. The contract allows for certain things and both sides must stick to it. Nixon thinks he can use the interview to rebuild his reputation and Frost, at first, just wants the ratings and the glory of the American audience. However, he also wants to get Nixon to admit wrong doing.

The movie is told sort of documentary style in parts, with most of the players speaking directly to the camera, as if they have been asked questions about what was going to happen or what happened. The 4 interview scenes are perfectly paced and we get a very good idea as what is going on inside the heads of the two combatants. Kevin Bacon, as Nixon's right hand man deserves some consideration this awards seasons for his performance as a man willing to follow Nixon until the very end. Sam Rockwell and Oliver Platt add some great drama and comedy as the team assembled by Frost to prepare him for the interview. I was expecting to feel bored at some point, but Ron Howard really kept the action moving, even within scenes. He displays a confidence in his material and is not interested in getting in the way of his actors, the story of the wonderful script. He is a facilitator in this project and he understands his role and makes the most of it.

Frost/Nixon continues a trend for me this fall/winter: great movies that are just missing something to make them better than great. I could not put my finger on it with Frost/Nixon, but it joins Milk, Slumdog Millionaire and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button in that category. There is nothing technically wrong with Frost/Nixon. Everything is sound and it all functions perfectly, but there is element missing, a sense of cinematic wonder or surprise.

Final Grade: A-

Doubt

Very few things scream Oscar season like Meryl Streep and Phillip Seymour Hoffman and when you combine their talents in one movie, it is an Oscar's wet dream. Such is the case with Doubt. Throw in 1 time nominee Amy Adams and a story about Catholic pedophilia and you have the makings of an Oscar sweep. Not so fast, though because the movie is written and directed by John Patrick Shanley. This is the man responsible for writing Congo and the last movie he directed was Joe Versus the Volcano, not exactly movies that were winning awards, or winning anything positive for that matter. Yet, on stage Doubt was a success, critically and so it made sense that transferring it to the screen and sticking Hoffman and Streep in it, all would be good, right?

Set around the time of JFK's assassination, Doubt takes place in a Catholic church and school, where Sister Beauvier(Streep) is the principal and she rules with an iron fist. She is a prison warden and she likes it that way. She is uneasy about the new Father, Father Flynn. Flynn gives sermons on doubt and he is a friendly man who preaches love, compassion and understanding. He wants to add secular songs to the Christmas pageant and wants to bring the church forward. Meanwhile, Sister James(Adams) is a young teacher and she is worried about the lack of warmth from the sisters and teaches her class without the super strict rules that Sister Beauvier tries to get her to enforce. One day Sister James thinks she sees things that do not seem right. Donald Miller, a student is called to a private meeting with Father Flynn. He comes back and Sister James thinks she smells alcohol on his breath. He is lifeless and sad. Later she sees Father Flynn putting one of Donald's shirts back in his locker. She tells Sister Beauvier what she thinks because Sister Beauvier warned everyone to keep an eye on Father Flynn because she did not like him. Sister James and Sister Beauvier call Father Flynn into an office and state their unsubstantiated claims. He gives a logical reason for everything, but is he lying? He has moved around a lot in the church and the church has been known to protect their priests.

I have a tell. When I am bored in a movie, it is not difficult to know. Erik figured it out years ago. I fidget. I do not mean just shifting in my chair because I do that often, but I get unusually fidgety. I check my watch often, but the biggest sign that I am bored is when my watch comes off. When I take my watch off to start playing with it or whatever, the movie has lost me. I believe about 35 minutes into Doubt, my watch was off. At first, I could not put my finger on it. The acting is phenomenal and the one scene where Streep, Hoffman and Adams share the screen is a knock out blow. The writing is exceptional and the story is interesting and I loved how ambiguous it was about whether or not The Father was innocent or guilty. Yet, there I was, sitting in The Tower Theater, fidgeting, checking my watch and eventually removing it. Something just was not working. Then in one moment, like a giant gust of wind, it hit me. Well, it hit me like a giant gust of wind, because it was a giant gust of wind. A giant gust of wind in the movie directly after Streep said something about the winds of change. It was not enough for her to say "The winds of change," the director felt need to include actual wind! There it was, the moment that brought the movie into focus for me.

I understand the idea of using weather or setting as a metaphor for something else. Yes, I get German Expressionism. it is easy to grasp but according to film classes, it is the end all be all in movies. Movies are brilliant when they use weather a symbol or metaphor, brilliant! I do not, on principal, take issue with it. I take issue with a director not trusting his writer, his actors or his audience to get the ideas. His actors are on screen acting their collective asses off and he ruins it. His screenwriter wrote an amazing script and he ruined it. His audience is most likely smart enough to appreciate the great level of talent involved and he ruined it. The whole thing is made worse when you realize he was his own screenwriter! Rarely has a movie had such a high level of acting and such a low level of directing. Here was a man who was just out of his league. Someone should have stepped in on this project and realized all of these amazing performances were going to go to waste, especially Viola Davis. Davis, in 1 scene as the young man's mother, gives the performance that makes careers. She is unbelievably heart breaking and it is even more impressive when you realize she is with Meryl Streep the whole scene and I have to give Streep credit because she gave the woman the scene. In fact, all of the actors are very giving, in the whole movie. They all believed in the project and they were let down.

A movie like this should have left me with questions and I should have been pondering the questions the movie poses. I should want to discuss with others my thoughts on the guilt or innocence of Father Flynn, or what Sister Beauvier means at the end when she breaks down and says she has doubts, but honestly I did not care. I just wanted it to be over. I wanted to get away from the German Expressionism and the bad handling of it all from the director. I wanted to get away from the crows, the dead rats, the feathers, the open windows and the literal winds of change.

Final Grade: C-. but the acting gets an A.